Hypocrisy is what I have been contemplating lately. The hypocrisy of each of us and the hypocrisy of us as an entire species. That’s what has been keeping me up at night along with my inability to let go. A plan to see fall colors in Vermont, which I thought would give me the much-needed change of scenery, got canceled because of my health issues. So I was stuck in Dallas on a long weekend. I started to search for a “change of scenery” and landed on Grady’s Airbnb. It’s a tiny cabin in the heart of Dallas surrounded by nature. Yes, you heard me right, I said cabin, nature, and Dallas in one sentence. Just a 40-minute drive away from home, Kero and I reached the tiny house for a 4 p.m. check-in.
A white farmhouse-style door leads you into a calm backyard that is filled with different kinds of trees, an airstream, a cottage, filtered sun through leaves, and the sound of dripping water from an old fountain. I knew immediately that I was going to like this place. My cabin was perched atop a small hill. As I opened the door, Kero ran in and sniffed every corner to make sure, umm, he sniffed every corner because he is a dog.
The charming little cabin is the definition of cozy. To the left of the door, is the living room, which consists of an old rocking chair. A large window divides the living room and the bedroom. The window brings big trees and birds and squirrels into your little room. Next to the window is a little nightstand and a very comfortable bed. Above the bed is a picture ledge, lined with quirky books and decor. In front of the bed is a door which leads to the kitchen. The kitchen has everything you would need to make some coffee or whip up oats. On the opposite side of the kitchen, is the bathroom, with a stone floor and beautiful frosted glass. And that is all the 200 sq ft home.
In this world of bigger homes than hearts, I like tiny spaces.
In this world of ever-increasing luxuries, I am drawn to simplicity.
In this world of artificial perfections, I crave authentic imperfections.
In this world filled with distractions, I search for silence.
The bareness of the house immediately grounded me. My chaotic mind felt at ease. I read a book and saw the sun go down the window. Feeling calmer, I slept for a little while, and Kero snored next to me. I woke up, made myself some green tea, and read another chapter. Since the sun was down, I started exploring the lights in the cabin (Things you can do, when your mind shuts up).
There was the generic big light with bulbs on the fan. But once you turned that off, you would notice a beautiful glass tile mosaic lamp on the nightstand. It sent out tiny speckles of color on the curtain. On the other side of the bed was a big lamp, whose base was made from an actual tree truck. In the Kitchen was a night light, which had a leaf for covering, reminding me of fall.
After about 5 minutes of mindfulness and noticing the house, my stomach started growling. I opened the healthy vegetable I had home-cooked and had got with me. But my farce of willpower and self-control gave way within minutes and I was scrolling to see which restaurants were nearby. When I found a Mexican mom-pop shop called Nubia’s which was just 2 minutes away, my resolution to eat healthy stood no chance. I picked up flauatas and elote. I came back home, sat in the wooden chair, and ate my food on a small wooden table. The Mexican rice was the best I have ever had. The flauatas and elote were delicious.
I went for a little evening walk, read one more chapter of my book, and was ready for bed by 8:30 pm. I dozed off, listening to the insects outside. Kero felt cozy too and slept through the night. He usually is anxious in such places and overly protective of me and barks even at a falling leaf. But the cabin’s calmness was contagious and both of us could feel it.
I woke up refreshed, and in a much better mood. I wasn’t woken by an alarm but by a multitude of bird calls(There are so many birds in Dallas?). I read one more chapter of the book and went outside for a walk. When I came back into the room and was packing to leave I couldn’t help but notice the difference in my temperament.
Nature has a way of healing us, no matter how much of our drama we throw at it. I have visited cute cabins before, but this one felt meditative. The cabin itself and its surroundings had put me at ease so quickly. I wondered then, is it human nature to be chaotic? Or are we by default peaceful? Have we cluttered our world with so much, that we have forgotten our very essence? I realized, that without intending to, I had done a one-day silent retreat. I had not spoken to anyone since I arrived in the cabin. So I took advantage of it, played Mr. Geonka on my phone, and did a little Vipassana.
It was time to leave. I noticed the sun rays forming patterns in the cabin as they crossed the glass window, the bug screen, and the mesh curtains.
After I returned home Grady messaged me, informing me that a part of the rent was going to RETREET, an organization that provides disaster relief to communities by restoring decimated urban forests. I felt even better about my stay there.
Contemplation throughout the stay
- Why do we judge quickly rather than take the time to understand?
- When we expect people to have fewer expectations, are we not having more expectations from them, ourselves?
- When we think of ourselves as kind, why is it so hard to give kindness to people who aren’t kind to us?
- Why is it hard to let go, even when you see the nature of the drama that you find yourself in again and again?
- How do I navigate finding a tiny house to move into?
- Why do we get angry when other people don’t behave according to our should be’s and must be’s and yet find it so hard to change our age-old habits?
- Why does my dog fart even after pooping so much?
- Why do we have to do do do all the time, rather than be be be?
- What do squirrels squick about?
- Why are we so hypocritical in most aspects of life?
- Why does the construct of me versus you change our entire fabric of beliefs?
Is this what makes us human, then? Oops.
I have no clue, and I have never trusted the thoughts of my fickle mind. For now, I am going to watch a leaf fall. Signing off.
Resources
- Grady’s Airbnb – https://www.airbnb.com/rooms/15342315?source_impression_id=p3_1696909628_Jf9%2BSUaA6VCbH8y5
- Nubia’s Drive-thru – https://nubiasdrivethru.com/
- RETREET – https://www.retreet.org/ourmission
very well written.